Saturday, March 31, 2012

Slightly Redder Red: Weekend Update 11

It's been a while since I've had a weekend update, I've been writing individual articles. Let's kick off the next ten.

1) . Game: New New Subtitle 2 is slated for a November release. Hold on to your butts, ladies and gentlemen. But it seriously feels like I'm reading a set of Patch Notes for the next WoW patch rather then the features of the next triple A game. Hopefully, consumers will wise up and NOT buy thirteen billion copies on the first day, considering that there has not been an engine or graphics update since Modern Warfare. The only bright side I can see is the removal of Aim Assist with sniper rifles, meaning no more 360-420-quickscope montages on Machinima.

2) Castle in the Sky is my least favorite Studio Ghibli movie as of two nights ago when I saw it. Sure, it was pretty cool, but it wasn't as good as Spirited Away or Batman's Moving Batcave.

3) I started doing a lot of Gameboy emulation on computer, and some games don't port well to PC at allllll. Super Mario Bros 3 suckkkks on PC, the sliding around Mario does when moving is just terrible to work with when using a mouse and keyboard. Games that do transfer well are the more strategy oriented games such as Yu Gi Oh: The Sacred Cards, any given Pokemon game, Final Fantasy V, or Fire Emblem. I also picked up Summon Night, but damn does it get extremely and unfairly hard later in the game, to the point where it's unplayable. I'll suffer. I'm actually really into Yu Gi Oh GX: Duel Academy right now, I have to tear myself away from complaining about how unbalanced Jaden's deck is to play the final hour of Mass Effect 3. Speaking of....

4) I beat Mass Effect 3, finally. Took twenty-two hours, and since it's mostly devoid of side-quests, it's the longest main story out of the three Mass Effect games. It's largely my favorite too, due to combining what was great about its predecessors into one great experience. I was a Paragon for my entire fifty-four hour playtime (since Mass Effect 1-3 are best played in conjunction, I count them all as one giant game that changes combat drastically after the first eleven hours), except for some moments I just couldn't see myself passing up. I shot Udina in the chest (that felt SOOOOOO fucking good, I hated that guy), I punched Admiral Gerrell in the balls for trying to sacrifice his civilians (even though I exterminated the entire Quarian race anyway), I broke Kai Leng's sword before getting retribution for Thane, and I shot the Illusive Man. Totally worth the Renegade score. I also went with the Red ending, which was to destroy all synthetic life in the galaxy, because that's what Anderson would have wanted. What pissed me off the most about the end was not that my choices meant shit in the end, but that Liara and Garrus, my ground team that was supposedly incinerated in Harbinger's blast, were on the ship with Joker on the jungle planet in the end. THEY DIED. WHAT THE SHIT? GHOST SPACE WAIFU?
        Yes, I romanced Liara. I have an extreme weakness for nerdy space scientists. Garrus and I were bros until the end, he's probably my favorite sidekick of all time. Vega was pretty cool too, but no one tops Garrus. I plan on wooing Garrus on my second playthrough as a Femshep Adept. No homo, it's just he greatest bromance in video game history, and I feel like I could be the greatest wingman Garrus could have by directing my alternate universe female version of myself at him.

6) Now that I have Mass Effect under my belt, it's time to start finishing the rest of my backlog. My second Deus Ex: Human Revolutions playthrough, Dark SoulsBioshock, a lot of stuff. I thought about playing through DX3  a third time, but on a pacifist run, but I decided not to, since I'll probably flip out and kill Song again for things I won't say because I don't like spoiling this masterpiece. Although I left a HUUUGE spoiler in my top ten villains article, I left a disclaimer, so that was okay.


  1. Devoid of sidequests? Dude I was walking through the citadel and picked up like 20 sidequests just accidentally overhearing conversations.

  2. But all they are is just flying to a planet, picking up an artifact with a probe, and flying back to the citadel. It's retarded.

  3. I haven't done any of them yet. I assumed it involved actual work. I'm too busy trying to gather bits of Batarian code where the console is quest marked but I can't interact with it. Awesome.

  4. Yeah, they're ALL like that. Oh, by the way, the Elcor ambassador's quest to evacuate Elcor from his home planet is bugged, it's completed by probe instead of evacuating Elcor. I was really excited to work with the Elcor's "finest warriors", but alas, it never happened.

  5. I forgot about that comment, got the quest, got excited, and then I was disappointed. Damn.


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